Just Sayin'

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Things To Ponder

1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 a piece on those
little bottles of Evian water?
Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE

2. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing
section in a swimming pool?

3.  OK..... So if the  Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the 'Jags'
and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the 'Bucs,'  what does
that make the Tennessee Titans?

4.  If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhoea, does that mean that one
enjoys it?

5.  There are three religious truths:
        a. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
b. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith.
    c. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or Hooters.

6.   If people from  Poland  are called Poles, why aren't people from
Holland  called Holes?

7.  If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*

8.   Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale
bread to begin with?

9  Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person
who drives a race car is not called a racist?
* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

10. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?

11.   If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it
follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys
deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners
*~*~*~*~*~*! ~*~*~*~*

12.  If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

13.   Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

14.   What hair colour do they put on the driver's licenses of  bald men?

15.   I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole
lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me ... they're cramming
for their final exam.

16.  I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little
spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use?

17.   Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?
What are we supposed to do, write to them?
Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the
mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?
*~*~*~*~! *~*~*~*~ *~*

18.  If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly
are the others here for?

19.   You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive!

21.   Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

22.   If a cow laughed, would she spew milk out of her nose?

23.   Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

24. At income tax time, did you ever notice: When you put the two
words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells   .....'THEIRS'?

All in the spirit of fun!


  1. Number one is the best. I have to remember to tell someone. I don't think they will think it is funny but I want to see what happens... haha good list.

  2. Aww...you are right...we Baptist don't ever recognize each other in Hooters, liquor stores and most definitely not at the craps table in Vegas!

    And...I think I'd be a great mascot for the Tennessee Tits!!!!


  3. Nice, I needed something to lighten my mood.

  4. Lying in my sick bed with little men seemingly driiling holeS in my head hurts...and laughing out loud at that post didn't help either. It did cheer me up though! :0)

  5. I liked number 5 myself. But, they all made me smile

  6. We could all use a smile, however silly the reasons are. People in the world has gone bonkers because they lost their sense of humour. How else do you explain massacre shooting and senseless bombings even on peaceful countries like Norway? Thanks for commenting peeps! Just keep smiling. It's good for the soul. =)

  7. Okay, I was a bit late to read this but I must have laughed the loudest!

  8. Nice, I needed something to lighten my mood.

  9. how did i not know this blob existed?

  10. JM: Glad thatmade you LOL!
    HS Diploma: thanks for commenting on my Blog.
    Violet: of course this dark half of mine existed. You were innocently following my other half. haha
    Welcome to my rants and delusions!

  11. You certainly have some agreeable opinions and views. Your blog provides a fresh look at the subject. Your blog is very unique, thanks for taking the time to share your view with us.

  12. Lol, mah brains trying to process all these things. Syntax error=0. If you think about it though all those things DO make valid points. I needs an aspirin.